Alcoholism and My Annual Physical: Nothing but Fun!

Today I went to a new Doctor because I changed jobs and had to find a doctor who accepted my insurance. I was fortunate that I did not have a chance to have my medical records forwarded prior to my going to this doctor.

I wanted to test a theory I had:

Facts are:

1. I drank heavily enough to have seizures during the last 3 years of my 15 year drinking experieinces.
2. I was hospitalized over 15 times with acute pancreatitis: http://www.uptodate.com/contents/acute-pancreatitis-beyond-the-basics
3. I was diagnosed with chronic pancreatitis for which I was given pain medication. I took that for about two years and then stopped because I decided that pain is relative.
4. I had multiple DUI's and visits to jail
5. I spent years in and out of #AA
6. I went from one rehab clinic to another only to leave and continue drinking
7. I developed Diabetes as a result of destroying my pancreas but that didn't come on until 7 years into my Sobriety.
8. I was on pills and then on insulin for a year until I decided to lose 35 pounds and start training like a ravenous beast

This new doctor and I had a conversation about my lab work that had come back and he had some concerns and was very empathetic and kind when he told me that I was borderline Diabetic. This was something that he could not explain because my Body Mass index indicated that I was overweight but he went on to explain that the BMI calculator does not account for overly muscular people. My blood pressure was 114 over 74 and this caused some further confusion. He asked me about my diet and I told him that I ate sensibly and splurged when i wanted to but was restrictive because I was an athlete. We went on to talk about my family history and there is no pattern or history of Diabetes. He struggled on for about 15 minutes until I told him to stop trying to understand.

I decided to give him the facts as I listed them out above. Suddenly all the lights went on and this guy understood what he was dealing with here. He then asked me if I was an alcoholic? I said, " Define the word "Alcoholic". He smiled and explained that he was asking if I had a drinking problem. I responded that this was avery different question than asking me if I was an alcoholic. I explained that the American medical Association defines and Alcoholic as someone who has a disease which they decided to label as alcoholism.

( http://medical-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/alcoholism)

I went on to explain that one point I had a very bad habit of drinking everyday until alcohol took over my body and caused me to become mentally and moreover physically dependent on it to get through the day. When I was forced by seizures and acute pancreatitis to be hospitalized, I was medically detoxed and went through rehabilitation  so in essence I developed a very bad habit that I brought on myself for a variety of psychological or environmental reasons and it consumed me physically. I concluded my dissertation about the habit of alcoholism by saying that I no longer had this awful habit because I had stopped drinking completely and live a very healthy life both physically and mentally. As a successful executive  father, and husband, I no longer have the need for this habit.

The look on my new doctor's face was one of pure delight. He congratulated me on my success in staying sober. I explained that there was no reason for him to congratulate me because I only had one choice, I could stop drinking or die. Anyone who does not make that choice deserves to die because they obviously do not have any of their rational thought processes or natural animal instincts of self preservation left. I n essence, if someone chooses to continue drinking when they know they are going to die than they deserve to die. They have essentially committed suicide. I believe and know that anyone who is medically detoxed and given some small amount of  counseling in order to regroup can stop drinking. It's actually very simple.

My doctor said it was not that simple and that alcoholism is a disease that kills millions of people. I said," you're right dr. *****. Alcoholism does kill millions of people. The American Medical association as made it so people who develop a drinking habit of their own free will now have an excuse. They have a label that they can put on themselves that prevents them from fighting back against that which started them down the path of drinking. They now can sit in a room with 30 other defeatist losers with a ten year pin who rely heavily on each other to stay away from the transcendent power of alcohol. There are legions of groups stronger than any other cause or political group that meet daily to whine on their hands and knees about their "disease". The AMA feeds this disease with counseling and drugs and hospitalization and million dollar rehab centers.................He stopped me before i could finish my tirade

He said okay I understand where you are coming from, so how did you do it? How did you stop drinking? I looked him straight in the face and said, I did it on my hands and feet. I did it on the strength of what is inside me. I did it angry. The day I walked out of the hospital I went to every bar and liquor store that over served me and thanked those people for being who they were. At my rehab center I ignored everything I was told about Alcoholics Anonymous and 12 step and I focused on myself and my anger. My anger was not only for the people who had looked me in the face and served me when i had no money or abandoned me when i was passed out cold and alone, it was for me.

My anger was mostly directed at the one person who not only caused all this pain but also the one person who could end it. I was not going to let any doctor or definition tell me I had a disease for the rest of my life and I was going to change everything.

Facts:

1. This February I am sober for ten years without a hiccup.
2. I walked out of #AA ten years ago and never looked back as it insulted my intelligence and understanding of what it means to be a human being.
3. I have been off insulin and other drugs for Diabetes for years and never check my blood sugar
4. I have not taken any pain medication for my chronic pancreatitis despite pain that most people would not be able to ignore
5. I am a successful business executive with my own home and beautiful wife and son
6. I can run ten miles at an 8:10 second per mile pace without blinking 3 weeks before my 40th birthday
7. I can lift almost twice my body weight on bench press
8. I have performed at the elite levels in 4 different obstacle races in my first year of trying

I had a great trip to my new doctor's office today because I am not an "alcoholic". I had a nasty habit that I broke. I tested my theory and had some pretty god results with the evidence that I collected.

There isn't a doctor in the world that can tell me I am an alcoholic. The reason is that alcoholism is not a disease. Diabetes is but they had a hard time with that one too because I worked really hard to get where I am. Chronic pancreatitis is a condition but the pain is bearable considering my body of work in the pain department.

There is no such thing as Alcoholism as a disease. Cancer is a disease, Multiple Sclerosis is a disease, and leukemia is a disease. You can't possibly compare a drinking habit to those true diseases. Alcoholics Anonymous,12 step programs, and every rehab center in the country wants you to believe in the lie of "Alcoholism" as a disease". Then and only then will you have an excuse to fail.

You can live the rest of your life on your knees as an "alcoholic" or on your feet as a powerful human being.

Alcoholism is not a Disease!