Hello,
My name is irrelevant but I am Unstoppable It's good to see you all here. Please don't sit and you really have no need to drink coffee. There will be no cigarette breaks and you will not be privy to any outlandish tales of destruction, criminal behavior, drug use, alcohol binges, or anything about my past problem with drugs and alcohol. I solved that problem back when I was 130 pounds and could not walk while sitting in an overpriced rehab center by myself. I solved it while standing in a bathroom after fighting with a "counselor" who encouraged me to "surrender". In front of that mirror I found anger. Anger is the best friend I have ever known.
Leave your Big Book of bullshit at the door Dr. Bob and leave your parables and stories on the street disciples of herd morality and weakness. This is not a pity party and I am not your sponsor. No one kneels. No one prays. No one surrenders, no one is powerless over anything or anyone. If you cannot abide by my rules in this meeting, you don't belong here and you wouldn't survive.
You could walk away from this gathering with a sense that I am an angry person but that is simply not the case in the way that you initially envision an angry person. I found anger or maybe anger found me and it makes me the best person I can be and helped me defeat my issue with alcohol and drugs. My credibility in this meeting can all be summarized by this fact: I have been clean and sober for 8 years without a moments hesitation or lapse in my commitment to being sober and clean. I never once went to an AA meeting after being forced to by the police and the courts and the only twelve steps I take are with a cinder block on my shoulder when I am training with kettle bells or walking to the fridge to make a protein shake.
Jobless, homeless, penniless are all realities I faced. That person chose to drink himself to near death. That person chose to destroy his organs. That person also chose to get medically detoxed and then never do it again. I am that person and I do not have a disease because alcoholism is not a disease.
If alcoholism is a disease I hide it very well with some sort of sorcery because I am 170 pounds of lean muscle, a management executive in a technology company, i run a 6.5 minute mile and I am training for a Spartan Race ( www.spartanrace.com) all this after ripping my ACl into pieces while playing basketball and developing diabetes. Yes I rehabbed the ACL without a physical therapist. I had the surgery and "rehabbed" the new cadaver ACL in my basement. wanna race?
You would think that if I had another disease like "Alcoholism" it would be playing off the other diseases and I would be in a wheel chair or something similar.The fact is that Alcoholism is a human construct designed to take away your ability to be human. You are no more than just an animal like those that walk on four legs. what separates you from those animals is a societal structure that dictates how you use your greatest asset: You human brain.
I laid in bed beside a guy with liver disease who was dying in the bed next to me when I was recovering from acute pancreatic. I asked the guy why he was there and he told me that he was dying from liver failure. I told him why I was there and his eyes told a story that I really could never even have the stomach to write down. The fact is that this guy never even had a drop of booze in his life and he was dying. I decided that a half gallon habit of 100 proof vodka was a way of living my life and I was going to walk out of there. Who had the disease?
I only wish my friend anger would have looked back at me in the mirror then. all she did was whisper. It took a dozen more hospital visits and a seizure before I had the opportunity to be in front of the mirror that anger decided to walk through and tap me on the shoulder. Here are some ideas about anger that I found interesting:
Triggering anger
Anger happens when I am frustrated from achieving my
goals. This may be a repeated thing, with each occurrence stoking the anger I am repressing until I cannot hold it in any more.
Anger is often an response to an insult to me or my friends. It is thus a defending action against an attack on my identity.
Anger is generally past-focused. That is, we are more often angry at things that have already happened. Even when I am angry about the future, it often is triggered by my putting myself into further into the future and looking back at a 'future perfect' event that 'has happened'.
The power of anger
Anger can be a very powerful way of getting what you want, especially in the short term. Indeed, this is one of the key reasons why it exists. When a chimpanzee displays anger, it is signalling to others that the subject in hand is very important to it, and it is ready to fight for it. Unless other chimpanzees are prepared to duel, maybe to the death, then they are more likely to back down.
Anger is also the last response of a cornered victim, and many a mild-mannered person has turned into a raging hulk when they feel there is no alternative. The surprise they create in their oppressors is often so great it gives them the winning hand.
Anger also gives a general power signal that does not need to be used that often, as other peace-loving people will generally tend to back down before a person they know has a tendency to anger. A 'look' is often all it takes.
Showing anger creates threat of harm. In this way, anger seeks to create
fear, which leads to capitulation or retreat. In this way, anger is a form of
power.
Anger can also be a positive long-term energiser, such as when a teenager decides to 'show' his parents that he is not the lazy slob they seem to think he is.
The hazard of anger
Although there are short-term gains to be had with anger, there are also a number of hazards. First, your bluff may be called and you can get into losing battles. A reason for this is that as anger boils over into rage you can easily lose all judgement and control and hence take on an opponent who can easily give you a good pasting (or hurt someone you do not want to hurt).
Anger and the effective attack (physical or psychological) can also gain you enemies. Even someone you have beaten and who now seems to be your friend is probably waiting for the moment when they can safely take their revenge.
Displacement
As anger is so hazardous, we often find other ways to vent it, displaced either in time or location. For example a person who is frustrated at work may be angry with their family, or perhaps will avoid this by going for a run immediately when they get home.
Displacement is a huge source of continued human strife, as we pass on our anger to other people, who do likewise.
One method of displacement of anger towards another person is to vent it on a punchbag or another inanimate object. This is seldom useful in cathartic 'releasing' of the anger -- research has shown that it just makes you angry for longer.
Thank you for hanging around this long. Anger as you can see can be useful. If you are smart enough to wage war with only yourself, you will never hurt anyone else. anger can help you wage that war with the self that allowed you to make the decision to drink and drug. There is no such thing as alcoholism but there is such a thing as choice.
Alcoholism: A disease of speculation
"In 1976, the writer Ivan Illich warned in the book, Limits to Medicine, that 'the medical establishment has become a major threat to health'. At the time, he was dismissed as a maverick, but a quarter of a century later, even the medical establishment is prepared to admit that he may well be right. (Anthony Browne, April 14, 2002, the Observer)"
History and science have shown us that the existence of the disease of alcoholism is pure speculation. Just saying alcoholism is a disease, doesn't make it true. Nevertheless, medical professionals and American culture enthusiastically embraced the disease concept and quickly applied it to every possible behavior from alcohol abuse to compulsive lecturing and nail biting. The disease concept was a panacea for many failing medical institutions and pharmaceutical companies, adding billions of dollars to the industry and leading to a prompt evolution of pop-psychology. Research has shown that alcoholism is a choice, not a disease, and stripping alcohol abusers of their choice, by applying the disease concept, is a threat to the health of the individual.
The disease concept oozes into every crevice of our society perpetuating harmful misinformation that hurts the very people it was intended to help. Remarkably, the assumptions of a few were accepted as fact by the medical profession, devoid of any scientific study or supporting evidence. And soon after, the disease concept was accepted by the general public. With this said, visiting the history of the disease concept gives us all a better understanding of how and why all of this happened.
The disease concept originated in the 1800s with a fellow by the name of Dr. Benjamin Rush. He believed those who drank too much alcohol were diseased and used the idea to promote his prohibitionist political platform. He also believed that dishonesty, political dissention and being of African-American decent were diseases. The "disease concept" was used throughout the late 1800s and early 1900s by prohibitionists and those involved in the Temperance Movement to further their political agenda. Prior to c.1891, the term alcoholic, referring to someone who drank too much alcohol, did not exist. Before that, alcohol was freely consumed, but drunkenness was not tolerated. Many sociologists contribute its non-existence to the very stigma that the disease concept removes. Drunkenness was not so much seen as the cause of deviant behavior-in particular crime and violence- as it was construed as a sign that an individual was willing to engage in such behavior." (H.G. Levine, "The Good Creature of God and the Demon Rum," in Alcohol and Disinhibitition, eds. R. Room and G. Collins.) During this period of time social ties and family played a much more influential role in an individual's life. Therefore, deviant behaviors were undesirable and less likely to occur. It was not until industrialization began, when the importance of social and family ties diminished, that alcoholism became a problem. We now live in a society that encourages binge drinking as a social norm, but at the same time, we live in a society that discourages it.
The "recovery" community's adoption of the disease concept began with an early AA member named Marty Mann. Her efforts, combined with a somewhat dubious scientist named E.M. Jellinek, began national acceptance of the disease concept. It was Jellinek's self-proclaimed "scientific" study that opened the door for the medical community’s support. E.M. Jellinek's study was funded by the efforts of Marty Mann and R. Brinkley Smithers. And, like so many other circumstances involving Jellinek and Mann, the study was bogus, if not outright fraudulent. The surveys Jellinek based his conclusions on were from a handpicked group of alcoholics. There were 158 questionnaires handed out and 60 of them were suspiciously not included. His conclusion was based on less than 100 handpicked alcoholics chosen by Marty Mann. Mann, of course, had a personal agenda to remove the stigma about the homeless and dirty alcoholic or "bowery drunk" in order to gain financial support from the wealthy. By removing the stigma, the problem becomes one of the general population, which would then include the wealthy. The first step was Jellinek publishing his findings in his book “The Disease Concept of Alcoholism," which was based on selected subjects who fit the criteria supporting Mann’s preconceived conclusions. Later, E.M. Jellinek was asked by Yale University to refute his own findings. He complied. E.M. Jellinek's The Disease Concept of Alcoholism did not stand up to scientific scrutiny.
Early in the 20th Century, the validity of the disease concept was often debated in medical circles. However, in 1956 the American Medical Association (AMA) proclaimed alcoholism an "illness." Then, in 1966, the AMA proclaimed alcoholism a disease. The decision was embroiled in controversy. Historically, Marty Mann had her hand in much of this and manipulated information and doctors into agreeing with the disease concept. Marty Mann used her position as founder of the NCA (National Counsel for Alcoholism) to promote the disease concept through Jellinek and the founder of the NIAAA (National Institute for Alcoholism and Alcohol Abuse) whose founder worked with Marty Mann during the institute's early development. The founder of NIAAA, R. Brinkley Smithers, was a major contributor to, and promoter of, the disease concept. It was his money that actually funded Jellinek's work at Yale. Smithers was also responsible for gaining insurance coverage for patients in treatment (hence the 28 day program.) Smithers was certainly not altruistic in his efforts. At that time he had already launched a treatment program for which he was lobbying for insurance payments. Acceptance by the medical community was the only way this could happen; alcoholism had to be a medical problem in order for medical insurance to pay for programs. We can see the influence of these "advances" everyday in treatment programs. Today, the treatment industry is a multi-billion dollar industry, with insurance paying the lion's share of the costs. [Author’s note: In 2008, insurance companies paid for approximately 40% of those who underwent alcohol and drug treatment. By 2008 “the lion’s share” of the cost of drug and alcohol treatment was paid by private payers.]
While it can be argued that Smithers' efforts played an important role, it was Jellinek's study that was such a monumental turning point for the supporters of the disease concept. The disease model was, in part, developed and promulgated by Jellinek and various other partial participants, all with personal agendas. Today (2009), Jellinek's "Stages of the Alcoholism" is still widely used to diagnose substance abuse.
I am a walking breathing living example of the power of action versus reaction. I am the antithesis of AA and 12 step. I am God in the same way that you are. You are not diseased. Your society, the doctors, the pharma companies, and the coddling rehab centers are the disease. They are the financial gift that keeps on giving over and over back into the system that welcomes people who drop to their knees and cry for help to cure their disease.
Stand and be recognized and welcome to your new life as an unstoppable master of one!
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